Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Vampires and That Time of the Month, Part 2

In fact, Constantine was so thrilled with this new way of feeding, he eventually had to hire someone to keep track of who was ready and who wasn't.  

Madge was a nondescript but pleasant middle-aged woman who excelled at keeping the scheduling on track.  This was no easy task.  Constantine preferred first-day blood; it was almost as tasty as fresh-from-the-vein.  He had found that later in the cycle, the blood developed a flavor that reminded him of bagged blood, nourishing but flat and vaguely unpleasant.  As long as he had a trove of willing women, he reasoned, he didn't have to settle for Three-Buck Chuck when he could drink Chateau Lafite Rothschild. 

Despite his plethora of bitches - as Madge jokingly called them - Constantine was truly amazed at his good fortune.  When he took the time to investigate why so many females flocked to him, he discovered that most human men found their bleeding so off-putting, the women endured intense sexual frustration one week per month.  Constantine couldn't understand this reluctance, but then again, he was a blood-sucking creature by nature.  Nevertheless, his cache of willing ladies was ever increasing as his "services" spread by word of mouth - theirs, not his ironically.  Eventually, Constantine recruited a few of his closest vampire friends to join in, for no other reason than to whittle down the long waiting list.


  1. This idea has BRILLIANT written all over it! Why do I get the feeling that even with his 'closest friends' that there will still be too many woman clamming for their, err, attentions.

    1. If only I could think of more to the story beside his dining preferences. Also, I think you may be the only person who is actually reading these....

  2. Nope at least two people are reading them. The idea is wonderful, I have been a lit put off from vampire stuff lately with the slew of emotionally aware crap vampires but this is great.