I just read Stacia Kane's Be A Sex-Writing Strumpet. In it, she has a chapter in which she describes that, while many of the characters in her books engage in anal sex, she has not, nor does she plan to. So if you write a sex scene that includes an act that one has never experienced, how can you assure authenticity?
I posed the question to my husband, and he being a rather intellectual type, launched into a long-winded commentary about how a writer uses their imagination, etc,etc. Yeah, yeah. Imagination can only go so far. If you've never been poked on the flip-side, how do you know what it feels like or what exactly happens? Watching porn doesn't really give you insight into what the receiver might feel. Is it something you can look up on the internet? Do you post a message to all your Facebook friends, "Hi everyone! I'm writing a scene where the main character gets the brown glove treatment but I have no personal experience to make the scene authentic. Any of you like to have their buns split?
So,does anyone have any comments about how they approached this conundrum?